What Deptford NJ, the mall, Borders and M. Shnatterer share?

The right stuff! The Deptford Mall in Deptford, Gloucester, NJ besides being the home of major department stores such as Macy’s, Sear’s, JC Penny’s, Boscov’s, has over 150 specialty stores. Shining among them you find Borders Express, located by Boscov’s. Michael Shnatterer is the store manager and also a fine musician. Michael’s salesmanship’s and marketing’s skills make Borders Express a gem of a bookstore where smart shoppers purchase books at significant discounts using their Borders reward card. The bookstore is neat, shines with friendly sales associates, and attracts savvy customers who get great bargains.

You can find books about Deptford history. Named after a small town in Kentshire, England, Deptford was a Dutch settlement in 1623, and later, after the Sweeds and the Finns, became a British colony. The hot-air balloon, which is Deptford logo, has a fascinating story behind it. Jean Pierre Blanchard left Philadelphia in a hot-air balloon in 1793 to meet with President George Washington, and landed in Deptford after 45 minutes fly.

I landed there, too, but in the mall at Borders Express to do a book signing on April 4, 2010. I was welcomed by Michael and his dedicated staff. Chatting with Michael was an enjoyable treat. He’s a bright, sharp and definitely cool guy in his late 20s. He is a scholarly and polished gentleman as well as a friendly and accommodating manager.

You don’t have to take my word. Drive to Deptford during this amazing spring scenery. See what a lovely, friendly and fantastic little town Deptford is! Shop at the mall and shake hands with Michael Shnatterer at Borders Express. Get the tools there to make 2010 income taxes reporting easy. Of course, get some books to challenge your mind, curiosity and imagination. Let the written word help you explore the past, the present and the future. Be more than all you can be – with poetry and prose. I know I’ll be there again, on May 1, 2010 from 2:00pm to 5:00pm.

Borders Express

Deptford Mall

Center Rd & Clements Bridge Rd

Tel (856) 845-2195

Main Level by Boscov’s

Newark NJ Beauties

Would you believe it’s all in Newark? Spectacular sights like the historical Newark Penn Rail Station, the Gateway Center and the Prudential Center. In this area you find the old and the new, the rich and the poor, the obvious and the subtle.

The Prudential Insurance Company owns most of the skyscrapers in proximity of Newark Penn Station. The building complex, named Gateway Center, is interconnected by glass-closed bridges (let me tell you – they are convenient on bad weather days). The bridges also lead from and to Newark Penn Station.

In the morning rush hour what a sight it is! Professionals storm out of Newark Penn Station with a newspaper and a latte or cappuccino to get to work and zoom back at 5:00 p.m. Some folks, the homeless or less fortunate, walk the streets soliciting. Newark has the same characteristics people have: can use some improvement!

Do you know what’s strange? Lunch is roughly ten to fifteen dollars; therefore, work hard, make money and eat up!

From abuse to the International Women Day on March 8

The abuse started at the birth of civilization and still persists, especially in third world countries: sex slavery, forced marriages, honor killings, and more atrocities. Yes, some women have been successful in life, like Egypt’s Cleopatra and Russia’s Catherine the Great, but most women are not born into privilege. Luckily some ladies have found inner strength to stand up and fight back for their God given rights.

          Here is a book written by Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn, titiled Half the Sky – Turning Oppression into Opportunity for Women Worldwide, which tells of the atrocities inflicted on women and of the success some women have managed to achieve.

For poetry and romance, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

This weather makes me long for sunny days

Whisper into my ear, oh sunshine!

Whisper into my hopes and dreams

Bright as bright you can be

Sunshine at last I want to see

To have or to have not

To hold a dream

Of sunny days to come

2008 copyrights- Hooked on You (poem book)

www.josephmangraviti.com

What's all the fuss about poetry?

           Poetry is a literary artwork used to create an intense emotional experience and or to draw attention to something that is true. This is done by using special tools: originality, concentration, experiment, attentiveness, and form according to Poetry for Dummies by The Poetry Center, John Timpane and Maureen Watts.  Words are to a poet what musical notes are to a musician, or marble is to a sculptor.

The poet achieves originality by expressing the ordinary in an extraordinary way, and vice versa. The art of using fewer words and, at the same time, express more meaning is concentration. The poet experiments with language in creative ways to startle awaken or challenge the reader. Attentiveness is the way a poet pays attention to the use of language. Form is the structure of a poem: a metrical structure for traditional verse (a sonnet or a ballad) or open form. 

How different is poetry from prose? Poems, even in open form, have a structure. Structure is the way the poet plays with words. Here is an example: my poem Thanks! from Hooked on You

When saying “Thanks” is hardly enough

But enough to show appreciation

When appreciation is hardly enough

But enough to glow on one’s smile

When one’s smile candidly says it all

Then saying “Thanks” is the sunrise

And “You’re welcome” is the sunset

We feed out body with food, our soul with God, and our mind with poetry. When overwhelmed by life or just stressed out, poetry is the solution because of its healing power, the tonic to a busy life, and the call of our inner life. Sometimes poetry makes one think, or plainly entertains with the image it creates. By seeing the ordinary in extraordinary ways or vice versa, the fantastic journey of life continues by bringing light where there is darkness.

For more information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

The Tarantella Dance- Potion for Poetry, Romance and Magic

What do you get when you combine Taranto, tarantulas, and Tarantella? A spectacular entertainment that fulfills the senses and the soul with music, dancing, romance, and lots of fun. Tarantella is a folk dance of southern Italy, made of quick and light triple hops and lots of swirls and twirls.

Taranto, the ancient Spartan colony of Tarentum, as a strategic city and port in southern Italy, has never stopped been rich in history, in culture and in traditions. How did Tarentum, combine the Spartan military training with the Athenian arts of entertainment? Taranto started as a home for unmarried Spartan women and free men. The location was picked by Sparta after consulting the Oracle of Delphi. The cheerful dancing to honor the Greek god Dionysius became the source of the tarantella steps. Taranto bloomed into a major place for commerce back then, during medieval times, and still is in our days.

During the 17^th century, harvest in suburban Taranto was plagued by tarantulas, the wolf spiders, while the church forbade dancing as a source of sin. The irritant injected by the tarantulas apparently gave a lot of discomfort and caused the victim (tarantato/tarantata) a trance. The medical doctors of the day, knowing the people’s need for fun, prescribed Tarantella, a frantic and frenzied dance as the best treatment for tarantism.

Tarantella became popular when a young girl, Miranda, developed a crush on a young farmer, Matteo, who was as handsome as he was shy. She went to see an old gypsy woman for help. The gypsy advised the young girl to pretend to be beaten by a tarantula as an opportunity to have the young man dance with her. The young man, who desired the young girl in return, dropped a tarantula near Miranda while they were both working in the fields. The tarantula bit the girl’s foot . The girl went into a trance. Matteo danced with Miranda until profuse perspiration, which was followed by a swim in the sea to cool off. Having to dance at least for a full week to make sure the venom was all sweated out, Miranda and Matteo became very close and fell in love. Later they got married. This was the Tarantella Pizzica (the spider’s bite): a cure for romantic and physical ills.

Cities were forbidden to train militarily under the Spanish rule so local men devised theTarantella Scherma, a dance with martial arts steps. Later, harvests and civil occasions promoted the Tarantella del Core, the courtship dance with added flirtatious steps.

Composers turned the Tarantella into masterpieces of music: Gioacchino Rossini, Frederic Chopin, Pyotr Ilvich Thcaikovski, Franz Liszt, Carl Maria Weber, and the contemporary Mark-Anthony Turnage. Even poems have been written to illustrate the enchantment of the Tarantella like Hilaire Belloc’s Tarantella.

As long as there are tarantulas inciting people to dance and fall in love, the Tarantella will charm audiences with its enchantment and amorous cheer. The Tarantella has been a traditional dance at Italian weddings. Tarantella contests and Tarantella shows are quite common. The Gauthier Ballet Troupe, The Armando Curcio Company, and other groups are entertaining audiences with Tarantella extravaganzas. Several regional styles of Tarantella can be viewed on www.YouTube.com.: Pugliese, Calabrese, Sicilian and Neapolitan. Long live the Tarantella and long live love and lovers!

for more info, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Michael Jackson - The Man in the Mirror

Exceptional entertainer

Who delivered

Electrifying performances:

Songs and dancing

That incited feelings

And excited the soul.

Michael Jackson –

King of Pop

King of moonwalk

King of robot

King of the stage

And king forever.

But what about love?

He loved all

From the bottom of his heart;

He really did.

How many did love Michael back?

Who gave him the love and friendship

We, as human beings, need?

Who knew Michael the man,

Not the entertainer?

Who was the man in the mirror?

The sad truth is we, the fans,

Didn’t know the person within;

We didn’t look behind

The spectacular performances:

We didn’t look inside his heart.

The pain must have been intense enough

To turn to Demerol for oblivion

And oblivion he found

When he stopped looking

At the man in the mirror

On June 25, 2009.

We, the fans, will always remember

Michael Jackson and love him.

Finally he has found fulfillment

And happiness before the Almighty. 

For more info, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

The Twelve Labors

Hercules’ twelve labors were the AA twelve steps of ancient Greece. Fathered by a promiscuous god, Zeus, and conceived by Alcmene, a mortal woman, Hercules was the target of Zeus’ resentful and vindictive wife, the goddess Hera. He was a man and a sinner who found himself on a healing journey toward redemption by undertaking twelve labors, the AA twelve steps of ancient Greece.

The twelve virtually impossible tasks were the means of penance the Oracle of Delphi revealed to Hercules to regain peace of mind and to free himself from the guilt and remorse for having killed his wife and kids. The rampage was caused by a fit of madness induced by Hera. The labors were conceived by King Eurystheus, Hercules’ cousin and enemy, a Hera’s protégé.

Hercules felt powerless just like we do at times when the odds are overpowering. Some unfortunate individuals, when  facing a crisis, are so overwhelmed that turn to substance abuse and or promiscuity and adultery. The lucky ones have family and friends capable to provide psychological support. These fortunate people will never know what it means to be powerless on a virtual suicidal path. The “sinners”, sometimes victims of unfair circumstances,  have no other alternative but to follow twelve steps, difficult but necessary if survival is the goal.

One can easily see why Hercules’ twelve labors were the AA twelve steps of ancient Greece. Hercules had to look inward to find the skills needed, and get help from others to achieve his goal.

To slay the Nemean Lion with his bare hands because the lion couldn’t be killed by any weapons (mental and physical strength).

To slay the nine headed swamp monster,  Hydra. If one head was cut off, two would grow in its place: the viciousness of substance abuse. Hercules used a torch to burn the neck to prevent head reproduction. He dipped his arrows into the Hydra’s poisonous blood for later use (ingenuity and smarts).

To capture the Golden Hind of Artemis, which ran as fast as an arrow. It took Hercules a full year to think like a stag to understand and find the way to catch it (patience and perseverance).

To capture the giant and dangerous Erymanthian Boar by pushing the animal into deep snow as advised by a wise centaur. (wisdom and listening skills)

To clean, in a single day, the Aegean stables filled with filth accumulated over the years. Hercules diverted two rivers whose waters went through the stables and washed them clean (humility, planning and executing).

To slay the man-eating Stymphalian Birds shooting the arrows earlier dipped into the Hydra’s poisonous blood (thinking ahead and learning from events in one’s life).

To capture the Cretan Bull with bare hands by tiring the bull to the point of exhaustion (patience).

To steal the mad Mares of Diomedes. Hercules employed some youths to learn his skills and better themselves (help and been helped).

To obtain the Girdle of the Amazon Queen, Hippolita who fell in love with Hercules’ looks and candor and gladly gave her girdle (charm and politeness).

To obtain the Cattle of the Monster Geryon who had one head, but six legs and six arms.  Geryon shot arrows at Hercules but Hercules’ arrows were deadly being earlier dipped into the Hydra’s blood (self-defense).

To steal the Golden Apples of Hesperides by Hercules holding the heavens for Atlas while Atlas got the apples (cooperation).

To capture the three-headed monster dog Cerberus protecting the entrance to the underworld and then return the animal back as Hercules had promised  Hades (upholding promises).

The twelve labors required:

To accept the problem

To realize a power bigger than oneself, God, can restore mental wellness

To choose to turn one’s life around

To analyze the situation to understand the cause/s

To create a successful plan of action

To humbly carry out the plan

To discover the hero within through prayer and introspection

To make a list of amends

To carry out the amends

To take a personal inventory toward self-improvement

To find inner peace

To help others who are facing similar problems

Hercules was not just antiquity’s role model and hero, but today’s. He, legend or legendary, still encourage the modern men and women to understand, to accept, to strive toward good, and to help others. The times have changed but the twelve labors are still here with us to restore to happiness and self-control what was once lost to weakness and pleasure.

For more information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

The Magic of Romance - Poetry, Chocolate and Flowers

A box of chocolate treats is a sweet thought while a kiss on the hand is definitely much sweeter. Flowers cause a heavenly smile while poetry unites two naked souls in the adventure of a lifetime when craving for gratification becomes boundless.

The senses play their sublime role by blessing two people in love with the promise of secret fantasies which turn into a pleasurable reality in a background of fulfillment. A ring on the finger becomes the starting point of having a life. The intimacy of two soul mates and of two bodies celebrates the miracle of creation with the pounding of a heart that is alive.

Just flowers? The visual rapture of flowers enhance the scent of a glorious body in the arousal of a demanding wish. You smell the scent of eternal ecstasy when you close your eyes to smell the fragrance of the soul aching for more. Joy becomes music, music becomes poetry, poetry becomes a sky of rainbows.

Just chocolate? As the mouth opens the hard reality can finally be tasted after a longing anticipation as spring celebrates with fireworks that explode in a heaven of thundering moaning. You were conceived in love so you can share love. Why not you? You deserve happiness and pleasure.

Just poetry? The whisper of nature becomes exulted under the winds of passion. The teasing of your immortal desire free the genie you imprisoned in the high towers of wisdom. What was not possible before is achievable now as Calliope, the muse of epic poetry, and Erato, the muse of erotic poetry, massage the inner chambers of your very soul.

The magic of romance is the high gear of a mysterious heartbeat, a cacao sensational music, and the enchanting spectacle of the flowers of true love. Close your eyes and dream because the dream is as real as you are. Shine and brighten any rainy days because poetry has unraveled the greatness in you with the splendor of skintight hugs and soft kisses. Live to love. Love to live.

For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Lucky Seven Easy Steps in Decorating and Furnishing Your Den

Turn your den into a fantastic retreat  by following my lucky seven easy steps. Your den is your private place to unwind or get excited, doze off on a recliner, or read and write.

Some of us, very few, are thrilled by the idea of home improvement; others, the normal people, shiver at the sheer thought of the work and costs involved, and at the possible aggravations to face when the final product doesn’t match the plan . My lucky seven easy steps are here to let you love your den project from beginning to end. 

Are you ready for a fun roller coaster ride with smart ideas, great color schemes and intelligent furnishing choices? Let’s go!

1)      The den has to reflect the terrific lady or guy you are for you to comfortably enjoy your den . Your den, more than any other room in the house, can show how conservative,  moderate, free spirit, homebody or party tuned individual you are.

2)      If you’re a lady, dazzle with your femininity. If you’re a guy, show off your masculinity.

3)      Pick color schemes and lighting designs that make the voyage to “I love my den” reaction  a reality. Let’s start by introducing your favorite color as the base color. God bless your elementary school teacher who had your write about your favorite color! LOL.

4)      Work with room size, floor coverings and walls (paints, and papers)

5)      Select the furniture pieces and curtains your feel comfortable with.

6)      Complement your den with paintings, posters, photographs, and plants  that mean a lot to you or you like a lot.

7)      Add your personal touch, the signature of your distinct personality.

The Den Defined by Your Personality

If you’re conservative, then the choices you make will be conservative; same goes if you have a bubbling personality or you are moderate person in your tastes. Medium to dark colors if you’re conservative; otherwise, light to medium colors.

Bring Masculinity or Femininity into the Den

Emphasize masculinity with sports related items, a combination of materials such as leather, stone and iron, or wild western objects.  Show off femininity with flashy blacks/reds objects or soft/muted tones, flowers, plants, and handcrafted wood pieces.

Color Schemes and Lighting Designs

Harmony and contrast principles dominate color schemes by combining warm colors (reds, pinks, oranges, yellows) with cool colors (greens, blues, purples), and neutral colors (browns, beiges, grays, blacks, whites): warm neutral colors for ladies, cool and neutral colors for men.

The den, being a quiet and comfortable place in an informal atmosphere, won’t have bright lights. Wall lighting and standing lamps will be very effective.  For warm climates, a ceiling fan with lights may do it.

Room Size, Floor Covering and Walls

Small can be beautiful.  We just have to work around it by not overpopulating it with excessive items.

If you’re conservative, choose medium tone solid colors such as blue, green or violet for wall to wall carpeting and you are not allergic to mites; medium color ceramic tiles (gray or in the brown family) or hardwood floors (mahogany or walnut). If you have contemporary tastes, go for light or very light tones for wall to wall carpeting or ceramic tiles, yellow or red oak for hardwood floors. If you are a moderate person, you may pick temperate tones and or neutral colors in wall to wall carpeting and tiles, and light to medium colors for hardwood floors.

If the furniture you have or pick is dark, then you want to choose light to medium colors for the floor and the walls; otherwise, medium to semi-dark colors. I would not recommend wall paper because the den is informal, but if you love wall paper, then go ahead with it, just make sure the color/s blend in with the floor and drapes. Because the den has usually one wall populated by windows, it’s smart to sponge that wall (three colors – a base color and 2 colors for the sponging) for the windowed wall and as the solid color for the remaining walls.

Furniture and Curtains

Select colonial, country, traditional or contemporary style to suit your taste. A computer center, a bookcase, and a recliner may do fine if you’re a guy.  If you’re a lady, you may want to add different size and height tables for your favorite flowers and plants, and a sewing machine if you’re into sewing.

If you live in a hot climate, go for medium to semi-dark curtains to deflect the light and glare; otherwise, light to medium colors will do fine.  You may want to avoid layers  like you have in a dining room or bedroom where a lace light curtain is under a regular fabric curtain.  

Paintings, Posters, Photographs, and Plants 

Go wild! It’s your place. A guy is not less than a guy if he has a plant or two in the den, like a desert plant. The fish tank you have always wanted – put it there! Some painting, photographs and posters will look nice.  Sport memorabilia and rows of photographs on the fireplace mantle and hanging on the wall will look great.

Personal Touches

Here some ideas: an antique phone or coffee table, medieval items such as swords, knives, helmets, a favorite book on display, baseballs or footballs signed by your favorite player, beads, ocean shells, traffic signs hanging on the wall, a liquor cabinet, etcetera.

Now Enjoy it!

Now you have created your dream place, enjoy it! You worked hard and smart to make it look the way you like it. If your friends don’t like, they aren’t your friends. This is your  private retreat where you can let it all “hang out”. In this place, it is alright to wear that T-shirt or blouse, and pants with holes because fashion doesn’t belong in the den.

I’m proud of you.! You did it. Now just keep your spouse and kids out. LOL.

For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Stress Management – Twelve Effective Steps

Yes, you can minimize the effects stress has on you, and, even better, you may make stress work for you!  Over my lifetime, I have come up with steps to reduce stress,  sometimes eliminate stress on particular situations, and occasionally make stress work for me.

Here are the twelve steps I like to share with you. You can see for yourself why they work.  Are they the result of extraordinary insight, shrewd philosophy or plain common sense?  What matters is these steps will help you achieve your goal to minimize stress, and, when possible, to make stress work for you.

1.  1.  Accept you are human.  The human nature and frailty have not changed much since the time of Adam and Eve’s fall from grace: “Cursed be the ground because of you! In toil shall you eat its yield all the days of your life. Thorns and thistles shall it bring forth to you, as you eat of the plants of the field. By the sweat of your brow shall you get bread to eat, Until you return to the ground, from which you were taken. For you are dirt, and to dirt you shall return.” (Gen 3.17).  How dreadful! Stress is the thorns and thistles we must deal with.

2.  2. Realize you need help. You need the moral support of family, friends, and co-workers. If you’re religious, also pray.

3.  3. List situations and people who cause you stress.

4.  4. When possible, avoid situations and people who cause you stress

.   5. When you can, prevent the circumstances that lead you to stress.

     6. Draft solutions for each situation and or person who cause you stress.

     7. As you test the solution over a reasonable period of time, finalize the solution and live by.

    8. Don’t be hard on yourself if you fail from time to time; just record the new stressful situation and repeat steps 3>7.

    9. Turn the energy caused by stress and anger in your favor.  Boxing the punching bag is better than beating the daylights out of that irritating, repulsive and good-for-nothing- individual/s you have to interact with.  Use that energy to stay physical fit by dieting and exercising.

     10. Do fun stuff with people you love and friends: sports, shows, gardening, reading, etcetera.

    11. Talk to people you know how they cope with stress and share ideas.

     12. Accept you are a wonderful human being! You have value. You are just the way God wants you to be; you just have to apply the skills you have to make yourself, your family and friends happier. You deserve happiness!

    Thorns and thistles in the form of stress will come your way, sometimes often and sometimes occasionally.  You have the skills to attack any negative situation by applying the twelve steps. Have fun when you can, and, most of all, believe in yourself: the terrific individual who is inside your body and mind.  You’re great! I say so.

      For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Italian Flavors

Traditions make Italians who they are. Being Italian means the rich history, the cuisine, the wines, the fine clothing and accessories by Italian designers, the unique people’s names like Guido, Fabio, Rosalia and Filomena. Most of all, Il Calcio (soccer), biking, the alluring beaches, the majestic mountains, fishing, il pisolino (afternoon nap), and house parties. A flair to live life to its fullness is an Italian trait quite visible and historical. Italian means dressing up for Il Carnevale, which is a sort of Halloween weeks long celebration, with lots of fun for kids and grownups alike.

During Il Carnevale, which starts the day after the Feast of Saint Agatha on February 4^th and ends the day before Ash Wednesday, kids and adults dress up in costume. Kids go from house to house, like they do on Halloween here in the States, to get treats and to throw confetti (i coriandoli). Grownups attend lavish masquerade balls, or house parties if the money is tight. This tradition , which started during the late Medieval Times masquerade balls, was later enriched by La Commedia Dell’Arte because of its popular and funny characters like Arlecchino, Pantalone, Dottore, Capitano, Colombina e Mirandolina. La Commedia is comedy shows performed for free at the town square during the seventeen century and even nowadays during festivals. La Commedia is often impromptu and has themes like the lord of the house wooing and pestering the maid.

Venice and Viareggio are known for their fantastic celebration of Il Carnevale, taken even to the streets. Treats like strufoli and zeppole (pastries) , and castagne (roasted chestnuts) are enjoyed by everyone. The mood is A Carnevale ogni scherzo vale (At Carnival time every practical joke is fine). Il Carnivale is the highlights of winter fun, besides skiing on the sharp Italian mountains like the Alps and the Apennines.

Spring, summer and fall make the evenings enchanting with house parties on the terrace under a smiling moon where music to dance to, finger food and pastry to please the ear and palate. Common pastries are cannoli, granita (Italian ice), briosche (Italian croissants). Common drinks are Campari or Cynar on ice. If you like serious liquor, have a Grappa or Strega. House parties are a great means for students to socialize, make friends and find a sweetheart.

Ferragosto is a month long summer celebration. Italians take all month of August off. People who live in the mountains go to the seashore. People who live by the beach go to the country side. City folks prefer the islands of Sicily, Sardinia or smaller islands like Capri, Alba, and the Aeolian islands. Everyone loves and visits the major cities of Venice, Milan, Florence, Naples, and Rome for their history, art and fine cuisine.

During Ferragosto, Italy becomes the Garden of Eden where fruits and vegetables are everywhere: on every street stands and al mercato (outdoor market): delicious watermelons, sweet grapes, apricots, plums and peaches, all kind of tomatoes, oranges, tangerines, eggplants, cucumbers, zucchini, and squash. Italy is also the land of picturesque vineyards and olive trees. The Virgin Mary is honored during Ferragosto in the Feast of the Ascension on August 15. Of course when it’s so hot, Italians like to take an afternoon nap.

As saying goes “When an Italian sleeps alone, he or she sleeps with the angels; when the Italian doesn’t sleep alone, the angels look the other way.” This is romance Italian style! Of course, the only reason Italians may take an afternoon nap is because they work from 8:00am to noon, go home for four hours to eat and enjoy romance then back to work at 4:00pm until 8:00pm. The evening is to have supper with the family then go out and socialize with friends at the bar. A bar in Italy is also an ice cream parlor, coffee house and pastry shop.

The fall is for wine making. Even though machinery have taken over, grape stomping is still going on at least for entertainment and to keep the tradition. The vineyard owner invites family, neighbors, and friends who hand pick ripe grapes; then grape stomping starts. The midday meal at grape harvest usually consists of spaghetti with marinara sauce, stockfish alla cacciatore, seasonal fruits, popular Italian cheeses and, of course, the prior season’s wine. A beautiful tradition is the guests make toasts in rhyme while enjoying the meal. One guest toasts “To wine-making, to health and prosperity!” Going around the table another say “May the white wine have perfect clarity!”, and another guest may continue with “The meal is delicious in true sincerity.” Jokes and pranks add to the joyful event. Guys woo the present girls by making poetic toasts and by trying to get the girls drunk. All at the table joke, tease each other while older folks remember “the good old days”. The fun is real and wine is made. Viva l’Italia!

Most holidays are the same like in America and in Europe: Christmas Eve/Day, Easter and New Year Eve/Day; others are unique to Italy and to Italy’s neighboring countries, like La Festa della Befana. La Befana is a good witch who brings presents to kids on the Epiphany Eve. Another holiday is Easter Monday, which Italians take very seriously. Easter Monday excursions to the country side and stopping at a local trattoria (a diner) for a fine meal or alla salumeria (a deli) for sandwiches are quite refreshing and very welcome after the forty days of Lent, the season for penitence and introspection.

Other popular religious Italian holidays are La Festa di San Giuseppe (Saint Joseph’s Day) on March 19, Il Giono di Tutti i Santi (All Saints Day) November 1, Il Giorno dei Morti (All Souls Day) November 2, and L’Immacolata Concezione (the Immaculate Conception) on December 8.

I must confess I am partial to Saint Joseph’s Day, a popular Southern Italy holiday with a unique dinner (pranzo) menu: peachicks and rise soup, baccala (stockfish), fried calamari, stuffed artichokes, broccoli of rabe in garlic sauce, rise balls, and zeppole for dessert. Because Saint Joseph’s takes place during Lent there are no meat dishes at the table where nineteen guests are invited and seated (19 because of March 19). The hosts and the guests recite a brief thanksgiving prayer before and several times during dinner: “Questa casa consolata sia con Gesu’, Giuseppe e Maria!” (Let this house find always comfort in Jesus, Joseph and Mary!).

Italian baby naming conventions are quite simple: the first boy is named after his paternal grandfather, the second after his maternal grandfather; the first girl after her paternal grandmother, the second after her maternal grandmother; subsequent offsprings are named after a favorite uncle, aunt or very close family friend. In my case, I was named Joseph after my paternal grandfather. Italians celebrate also name days, besides birthdays.

The flavors of the Italian cuisine suit every palate. Northern dishes like risotto, osso buco, gnocchi, spaghetti with pesto sauce, and southern dishes like lasagna, eggplant parmigiana, baked ziti, stuffed shells, and pasta with marinara sauce are only a few. The list is far too long to be even mentioned here.

What about pizza? Regular, Sicilian or sfincone. I knew I was going to catch you on this one! Ah, ah! Sfincone is a pizza made on the eve of major holidays when abstinence from meat is traditionally required: Christmas Eve, New Year’s Eve, and Good Friday. The pizza is topped with tomato sauce, sliced onions and peppers (previously sautéed in olive oil and butter), breadcrumbs seasoned with parmesan and romano cheese, oregano, parsley, basil, rosemary and olive oil. The pizza is baked at 375 degrees for 35 to 45 minutes while it is pressed down by another pan, which is removed a few minutes before the pizza is ready, to have a crispy top.

Italian is the language of poets: Dante Alighieri, Francesco Petrarca, and Giovanni Boccaccio. It’s the language of artists: Michelangelo Buonarroti, Leonardo da Vinci, and Raffaello Sanzio. Italians celebrate their patriots in Giuseppe Garibaldi and Giuseppe Mazzini, composers in Giuseppe Verdi and Gioachino Rossini, and in inventors like Guglielmo Marconi. What about love, passion and pure lust? Visit Verona and admire Juliet’s balcony climbed by Romeo every night so he could be with his Juliet.

Like people of any nationality, Italians are proud of their heritage: they treasure it, they love it, and they perpetuate it. Beliefs, customs, history, culture, religion, arts and teachings make people who they are. They define and shape the individual in the continuity of history and civilization, and in the eternal flux of progress which makes the human soul reach beyond the heavens to touch the hand of God.

For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Growing up in Italy

The breathtaking landscapes and seascapes, the picturesque mountains and the shorelines that embrace Italy like a shawl made my growing up in Italy very magical.  Italy, the land of soccer games, biking, romance and fine food highlighted the explorations teenagers undertake on their way to adulthood.

During spring, summer, and fall we played soccer on the beach, got into fights, some verbal and others physical; then to cool off, we went for a swim as friends. As the goalie facing the opposite team members, I had to be tough on the field, and later I knew how to be tough in life. Even if nobody taught us, but life itself, we learned team spirit and team play, the basic qualities to become responsible grown-ups.

The Italian school system promoted more than just knowledge. There were no multiple choice and true/false tests, only oral presentations and essays on every subject except for mathematics where we had to write and explain problems on the blackboard or on the test. This kind of training set us to be good business people one day, to talk and to write well and without any fear.

Finally, romance came into my life! It happened just after Zeffirelli’s Romeo and Juliet came out in the movie theaters. Anna Maria looked just like Olivia Hussey; I didn’t look anywhere near Leonard Whiting. I do believe I was much more romantic than he. Anna Maria and I attended school functions, church affairs, and family gatherings. We went to lots of house parties where refreshments and dancing on the terrace made socializing easier for all of us high school students. Anna Maria and I did what any teenagers in love do, and we had fun.

Growing up in Italy was one of the best and greatest experiences of my life. After completing high school, owning only a pocketful of dreams, I left Italy on the Leonardo da Vinci cruise liner. I arrived in New York City nine days later to do my very own discovery of America. God has been benevolent and patient with me: the dreams turned into accomplishments over a period of time.

After all these years, I have not been able to go back to Italy, not even on a short vacation. Anna Maria grew up into a fine lady, married a former schoolmate of ours, and has five kids. I grew up, too, got married to a Polish princess, and have three kids.

Destiny unfolded while surprising us all. As time passes, we cherish the wonderful memories we made, and look forward making new beautiful ones.

 For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

The Land of the Brave is My Home

They say one can find money on the street in the U.S.A. and so I did. I had arrived from Italy.  I was living in Sheepshead, Brooklyn NY, and attending Brooklyn College in the days they were filming Welcome Back Kotter with John Travolta.  I was working at Lamston’s, a former popular convenience store.  One morning, on my way to work, I found my very first ten dollar bill on the street.  Finding that free money felt good and I took it as an omen of good things to come.  I knew I was in the right place: the U.S.A., my new home, after having left family and friends behind, for good.

Lucky for me, I had learned English in middle and high school in Italy.  At times, I found overwhelming being bombarded with English everywhere I went:  school, work, church, night clubs, movie theaters, and television. It was like learning how to swim when you’re thrown into the water and you have no other alternative: swim or drown.  Nothing scared me back then, nothing scares me now. 

College, a job and dating took care of my loneliness and my youth. I dated  a lot and I mingled with different nationalities.  It didn’t take long before I said “I do!” at Saint Stanislaw Koska Church in Greenpoint, Brooklyn, to my very own Polish princess, Diane.  Three kids later and working two jobs, Diane and I were living in Holmdel NJ, and we still live, a good neighborhood to raise kids.

Time is a man made entity, but never the less, it moves ahead at super speed. It seemed I was a teenager yesterday and woke up today a man with wife, kids, job responsibilities, a house, and a dog.  When I look in the mirror while shaving in the morning, I see a familiar smiling face, just somehow  older.  It’s still I!  The kid in me has never gone away.  The flair for living and having fun is well rooted in me.  I love to mingle with people and make them smile in the neighborhood, on the job, and on the express bus to NYC from and to work. 

My communication skills have brought me success as an IT consultant, a writer and a poet.  Every day unfolds a new beginning.  I am happy my home is the Land of the Brave.  I am brave, too, facing new challenges every day, setting new goals and bring them to fruition.  They also say one has to work hard and smart if he or she wants to achieve the American dream. 

I am where I belong!  I am where God wants me to be! I am in a great country forged in the blood and struggles of numerous generations – America the Beautiful!

 For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

A Tale of Passion

How much love
May a princess and her prince share?

How much is true romance
Important in lovemaking?

How much is commitment sealing
The hearts of two soul mates?

Sweet Sleeping Beauty asks
Herself these questions
In her long sleep
Caused by the evil fairy’s spell.

For now she can only wait and dream
Of her dashing and daring prince.
The prince’s kiss of true love
Will break the spell and mark
The beginning of an endless romance:
   Rich, passionate and fulfilling
   Finally the love of a real man!
   She wants him next to her –
      Grabbing her all over
      Kissing her
      And penetrating
         Her very soul with brute force
   Have him mark her as his woman
   His property and his queen
   Have him seed her
   With his male gift
      Driven by his overwhelming needs

Have him worship her beauty
While she worships him
On her knees like a god
 The prince is a god of raw potency
Set to conquer her body, mind and soul
 
Let him do as he pleases
Because that’s the only way
     She can be pleased too
 
Finally the moment draws near
The time is now!
Destiny is unfolding at last
She can hear
   The galloping of his wild horse
   She can hear his feet coming closer
   Rapidly and without hesitation

Waiting even for a moment
Is now unbearable and painful!
She can feel his body next to hers

He is excited
He is going to do it
He is kneeling to kiss her
He is now kissing her with all his lust
She opens her eyes and smiles at him
   He is determined, strong and brave
   He is all over her
  She cannot stop him
  She doesn’t want to stop him
 
The sleep is over
And the beginning
Of the greatest adventure of all begins -
The adventure
Of man and his woman
For right now
And for times to come

For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Missing You, Dad!

You’re my dear dad who, due to a cancer blow,

I was not lucky to love and to get to know -

You’re far away in heaven

Where I cannot see you again

Your death left me virtually devastated

Part of me died with you surely

After all these years gone and hated

I still find your loss unbearably

My soccer games you didn’t attend

Where I loved to compete and contend

You didn’t take me hunting, fishing

Mountain climbing or outdoor camping

My school teachers you didn’t meet

To learn how I did in the classes’ elite

A spruce with me you didn’t cut down

As our Christmas tree to be the best in town

You were not there for me, your lad

When I was in trouble sick, or sad

You didn’t walk with mom into the hall

On my wedding day to smile and stand tall

I had to be the man

With no man around

To teach me how to be one

No boy deserves to be bound

To such tough challenges’ cruel gun

My tormented ecstasy on Father’s Day -

I smile to my kids and a happy image I portray

With no dad of mine to see grow old and gray

Why did you have to die?

I was only four years old –

Definitely too young to cry

When I look up at the sky at night

I see a beautiful star glowing bright

I know you are that star

Letting me know from afar

Watching over me – you are

That’s when I strongly feel

Your love for me is very real -

Father’s and son’s enduring seal!

Though I will always be the boy

Whose love for you is my sad joy

The time has come for me

To say “Goodbye”

Finally your death I have accepted!

I will go on proud with my life

Be the man - to be I was destined

Enjoying the happiness I deserve.

  For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Dashing and Daring Giacomo Casanova Wooing You

I Want You - Casanova in Love

I want to embrace you tight for hours.

I want to hold you close to my heart.

I need to feel your heartbeat

Beating frantically.

You can feel mine pulsating madly.

I must explore and massage

Every inch of your body.

Just hugging and kissing your lips gently

Is all I desire.

You belong to me!

You sense it!

You know it!

It feels right!

It feels great!

Destiny has brought us together

To be one flesh.

Lasting skintight hugs will lead us

To heavenly delights:

Pleasures of the flesh

And pleasures of the mind.

I am going crazy over you.

You are the hottest!

I cannot endure the torment

To love you from a distance.

I want to feel your body trembling with pleasure.

I must have you at any cost

Else I will die in terrible pains.

I need to hold you and make you mine constantly.

I want you every hour of every day

Of every year, Baby!

From a delicate and innocent kiss

To passionate ecstasy,

From quiet lovemaking

To voluptuous and explosive rapture,

From lustful moments to an inescapable frenzy,

I must explore your mind

And deeply penetrate your very soul,

So we both can explode in fireworks

On a bed of earthquakes.

  For more author's information, visit www.josephmangraviti.com

Gifts for Him by a Woman Advised by a Guy

Life is fun! I love to watch women advising other women what’s the right gift for him, instead of asking a guy. Here is my advice and it’s free. Keep in mind it’s alright not to agree with me. We all know not two men are alike, so what one guy likes, the other may hate it. Isn’t life exciting? The simplest solution is to read us and learn who likes what. We don’t keep secrets. We usually tell you over and over again the same old thing.

Open up yourself and let me help you do something you value. Whatever you like, I may like it, too.

Accept God made us guys the way He wants us to be; after all, He made women the way He wants women to be. You have no ideas how much pressure we guys feel by women who expect us to behave in their perception of what a man is about.

Allow me to open up myself. Learn who I am. Get to know what’s hidden in my mind and in my heart. Incite a conversation. Make sure it’s revealing on both sides. I hate to tell it all private stuff while you make only superficial comments about yourself. The conversation has to be an exchange of ideas and thoughts, especially personal stuff.

Get to know what I truly like (besides sex!?!): sports, shows, movies or poetry. By sharing activities with me you show you’re a companion and a friend. In my case a poem written by you about me would euphoric.

Let’s go shopping together. I forbid you to faint, but you may laugh!?! Watch me when I smile at something I like. Surprise me with it. Nothing too expensive, else I would feel guilty!

Does all this sound familiar? Maybe it’s what a lady wants from a guy, too.

www.authorsden.com/josephmangraviti

Poetry Stress and The Punching Bag

We can be quite happy we have a lot of company in stress.

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Those days of living a simple life on a farm are long gone. We live in a society that becomes more stressful every day. Just think of having to deal with voice mail and voice menus. You call customer service and you have to wait what seems to be a lifetime to talk to an operator. You must go through voice menus and menu options that have nothing to do with the question you need to ask. You are now stressed out.

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Even though stress is caused by external factors, the effects are mediated by one’s abilities and perceptions.  We need simple and effective solutions to today’s hectic pace to bring out our inner and, sometimes hidden, skills.  Poetry and the punching bag are effective stress management tools: poetry for relaxation and the punching bag for mental repairs. You cannot punch the boss, but boy if you can punch that bag! Let it out and feel better. Poetry may lead you out of stress. It makes you think like mathematics and makes you wonder like astrophysics.  Besides, poetry stimulates your mind; therefore, it makes you smarter. When you think, you got no time for stress.

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Look at stress management techniques: it’s exercise (mental), it’s a hobby, it’s relaxation, it’s artistic expression, it’s natural medicine (e.g.: the body’s vital ability to heal itself). Dr. Alaoye (Ph.D in psychology) is specialized in stress management. Dr. Alaoye reads and writes poetry (1) to prevent, relieve and control stress.

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Poetry is to the mind what food is to the body: nourishment. Poetry is a good way of relaxation; it promotes and expresses sensuality, spirituality, empathy and understanding. When twenty-four hours are not enough in a day, take an hour to read and or write poetry and to punch the daylights of that punching bag in the basement or at the gym. After you do that the twenty-four hours in a day magically seem fine.

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References -

(1) Passions of the Soul (poem book) by Elaine H. Olaoye, Northwind Publishers, 2002

www.josephmangraviti.com

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The Magic and Power of Poetry

Good poetry is like math - it makes you think. 

Unlike reading a novel where you turn the page frantically to get to the very end so you can enjoy a climatic finale, reading a poem makes you stop, think and relate to it.  I don’t endorse obscure verse, which is the cause for many people to shy away from it.  Let me show you what I mean with an example. Here is a passage from the Bible, which I think is poetry in its purest form. (I can assure you I don’t have any ulterior religious motive here). I just like to enjoy with you poetry as a means of philosophical thought, entertainment and enchantment.

John 1:1
In the beginning was the Word
And the Word was with God
And the Word was God

The way John does it so simply, yet breath-taking, leaves me dazzled.  That’s great poetry! 

To use simple words to create an image in your mind, like a painter uses a palette and colors to show something common in a spectacular way, is an astonishing gift.  Good poetry moves the reader with the beauty or drama of what is being described.  Verses are all about creating feelings in the reader’s heart, mind and soul while asking questions like “Do you like it?”, “What do you think?”, “Has this have happened to you?”. 

Poems  draw you in their magic world of words and cadence.  That’s the power of poetry!  That’s the power a poet has to excite pleasure by using his or her communication skills. 
Poems can also haunt you.  Think of the soliloquy in Shakespeare’s Hamlet: “To be or not to be, that is the question”.  It’s mind blowing! 

Poetry, like math, enhances your mental skills, and, at the same time, it goes the extra mile: it’s pleasure for your heart and soul, too.  That’s why I read and write poetry.  I encourage you to do the same. Be not afraid, read it and write it!  

www.josephmangraviti.com

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